Happy Birthday!

This morning, I tried to get Ryder to tell me "Happy Mother's Day!"  Instead, he said, "Happy Birthday!"  In essence, he got it right though.  When I became a mother, it was like being reborn.  Suddenly there is tiny little being who changes your life completely.  Yes, at first I was more consumed with the sleepless nights and constant diaper changes, where I just felt like I was in survival mode.  Eventually though, it became more about the smiles, the giggles, the sweet kisses.  Now I look into his face and I feel this overwhelming joy because becoming his mother made me into a better person.  I am sure many other women feel the same way as well.  So Happy Birthday to all my fellow moms out there! 

Burn, baby, burn....

As you can imagine, since I have blond hair and blue eyes, I am very pale.  In high school and college, I worked as a lifeguard and normally only needed to use sunscreen the first few weeks until my skin adjusted.  I don't know if it's because I'm getting older or the sun is stronger--I am probably personally responsible for at least one layer of destruction to the ozone with my heavy use of Aqua Net as a teen--but I burn much easier now.  During our neighborhood garage sale, I spent most of the time in the shade; however, what time I did spend in the sun was enough to make me look like a warped candy cane.  Half of my arms are red and half are white.  My face is also a scary shade of red--one more garage sale and I could start competing with the "tan mom" on the disturbing-effects-of sun spectrum. 

As I was attempting to take a shower yesterday (because nothing feels worse on a sunburn than the stinging razor cuts of water from the shower), I realized I really need to make sure I use sunscreen this summer.  I am very good about remembering to get the kid lathered up, but I often forget about myself.  So I have decided that our shower needs some modifications.  I'm sure the husband will get right on it.

For those of you who have done spray tanning or Mystic Tan, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.  For the rest, there's a picture below. 

I want to have basically a Mystic Tan sprayer installed in my shower. Instead of the chemically-filled mist that mysteriously tans your skin, mine will shoot out a mist of sunscreen (hopefully with minimal chemicals).  Think about it--how awesome would it be to finish your shower, put on your protective eye wear, and then push the button for your perfectly-applied sunscreen application?  I mean surely I am not the ONLY person who seems to sizzle like bacon under five minutes of sun! 

So now I just need to think of  cool name for my invention so I can patent/trademark it!

I have survived...

I promise not to bust out into Gloria Gaynor (at least in public), but I have survived!  This week was hell challenging.  I had two papers due Monday, a final on Wednesday, and a trial notebook due Friday.  Add getting prepared for a massive garage sale...oh, and then there was the added situation of two coworkers unable to work.  Yep, made for an interesting week of minimal sleep, lots of coffee, and possibly some insane muttering on my part with a slight head twitch.  I'm happy to report that after a two-hour nap this afternoon, those symptoms are disappearing.

Honestly, I could not have survived this week (or really the past two years of school) without the support of great family and friends.  So I am going to make sure I list some of the people who made this week possible (no trophies are being given out--sorry):

My husband: He took off Thursday so that I could work all day uninterrupted.  Oh and for ignoring the pit of despair our house has become recently. 
My in-laws: They watched Ryder twice this week (and close to every week for the past two years-sometimes on short notice).  
My parents: My mom was awesome enough to get Ryder signed up for fun Indy Park classes this summer - I would have forgotten.  There are a million other things she and my dad have done, but this is a blog post-not a novel.
My friend Natalie: I probably would have flaked on the garage sale if she didn't motivate me and help me!  Looking forward to doing it all again tomorrow. 
Natalie's sister Stephanie: (Also my friend) who wonderfully volunteered to bring us food today!
Scharme from work: Every time I thought I couldn't type any more, I just thought "transcriptionist hoarder", laughed, maybe cried, and got back to it.  I'm being melodramatic, of course, about the crying part.  
My son: He's just awesome; it's really all there is to it.  Although, he doesn't look real thrilled to see his stuff being sold! 

Xanax with a Nyquil Chaser

I work from home as a medical transcriptionist.  I also have a VERY active 3-year-old boy who is home with me during the day.  This 3-year-old boy has recently decided he is beyond nap time.  We went from a three-hour nap every day to NOTHING.  In fact, putting him in his room alone for nap time has proven to create chaos: once he redressed himself in dirty clothes, another time he emptied out all his drawers, and finally he managed to pull his dresser down.  I decided it is just safer for all of us if we don't even try nap time now.

This lack of nap time has made working from home quite difficult.  I tend to work when he is asleep.  I'd get up at 5:00 in the morning and work until he got up around 8:30 and then again during nap time.  Now that there is no nap time, I've had to get creative and work more during the evening when the man is home.  Unfortunately, my body has not adjusted well to this newly-established creativity.  I will walk around all day long in a zombie-like state of exhaustion.  As I sit at my computer, I feel my eyes becoming heaver and heavier and the doctors start sounding like the teacher from old episodes of "Charlie Brown."  (If you don't know what I am talking about, you are probably too young to be reading my blog.)  I count down the reports until I can FINALLY fall into my bed.

Then it happens...every night.  I am wide awake.  It's like my brain just needed my body to lie down to start functioning.  I start thinking of all the stuff I need to get done or the fact that our house is starting to look like a candidate for an episode of "Hoarders."  (In my defense, I am preparing for an epic garage sale...you should come.  Please take my junk.)  I start watching the minutes tick by on the clock and counting down how much time I have left before the kid wakes me.  Luckily, I have a prescription for Xanax (I suffer anxiety, which can be an entire post on its own), but I try to use it sparingly.  Also, by time I decide I need to cave in and take one, it's often late and I worry that my zombie state will be even worse.

Last night--who am I kidding?  It was this morning--I decided to take the Xanax.  Simultaneously, I happened to notice my husband's bottle of Nyquil from his last cold sitting on the counter.  I don't know why it popped into my head, but I suddenly thought if I take the Xanax now and then a shot of Nyquil it might knock me out immediately and I can get a full 4.5 hours of sleep!  And then I thought, "Wow!  You have sunk so low."

This morning I am very thankful I did not take the Xanax with the Nyquil chaser, and I blame the moment of insanity strictly on exhaustion.  It just goes to show though that lack of sleep will make you think crazy things are completely reasonable!  This is why I am NOT allowed to watch any infomercials past 1:00 a.m...anymore.

Kids say the "cutest" things!

This morning I had to run onto campus to turn in my research binder for my litigation class.  Those of you not familiar with the IUPUI campus, it's a bizarre wonderful place full of interesting characters, especially during the day.  I brought the kid with me, hoping he would save any major meltdowns for AFTER we left campus.  He was actually quite charming...until we saw this. 

Okay, so it was NOT exactly her (aka Lisbeth Sanders), but obviously the girl was going for the same look.  Until this point, Ryder had been more than happy to point out all the cars and trucks we were seeing, but suddenly Ryder very loudly exclaimed, "Look, Mommy, a shark!"  Oh, did I leave out he pointed?  Yes, he even pointed at her.  It's not like she was across the room either.  Instead, she was walking toward us, about to pass by us.  It was the first time he had ever said anything like this in public so I was completely unprepared how to handle the situation.  Instead, I just avoided eye contact and tried to distract Ryder by outing the cool escalator "over there", nowhere near the girl.

Is it wrong to put a sign on the kid saying I cannot be held responsible for anything he says?

P.S. If you are the "shark" girl my son pointed out today, I really applaud your bold look.  

Hello, hello!

So one of my many New Year's resolutions was to start a blog, and I did.  Then I kind of forgot about it, and apparently forgot my password.  Instead of requesting a NEW password, like a reasonable person would, I just decided to start a new blog.  What is the purpose of this blog?  Your guess is as good as mine.  I look at is as a work in progress.  Perhaps it's a place for me to document my quirky little family, maybe I'll show off all the cool and professional-like photographs I plan to take (again, another New Year's resolution).  Of course, more than likely it will just be some place for me to express my weird random observations.  No matter what, I plan to stick with it (unlike that weight loss goal I had planned too - - darn you, New Year's resolutions)!